Comments on: Torn

By: beth aka confusedhomemaker

beth aka confusedhomemaker — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 19:05:22 +0000

(((hugs & prayers)))

It seems that you already know what you have to do, but now you just have to do it. Helping out isn’t the end of the world & Tink isn’t going to be damaged from it (I went work with my parents as a kid, it was a good experience) BUT with everything else on your plate it’s breaking you. Think about it, sitting there crying and fearing the fact that you have to leave isn’t a good thing for you, her, or your marriage.

I also agree on the perfect home, meals, and the like. Don’t focus on that & create short cuts when needed. The reality a perfect home/homemaking life is not going to happen even if you were home all day everyday, you’d have times were getting all your ducks in a row wouldn’t happen remember that this is just like one of those times. Right now focus on creating a sense of calm & rhythm within the choices & roles you currently are having to navigate. I know that sounds impossible, but it’s about paring down & letting go. If that basket of laundry never gets folded, so what? Will the world end? NO. Easy dinners are still better than no dinner, etc… I know how hard it is to balance a lot of things at one time, it’s easier said than done.

And again you know what you want to say, your last line says it all, now you just have to gain the strength to say it to him versus online, kwim?

*also St. Joseph also can be of tremendous help with husbands. Just a thought…
beth aka confusedhomemaker´s last blog ..Help a Brother Out

By: Liz

Liz — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 22:09:11 +0000

As others have mentioned, it sounds Sundays are about be the last straw. Take a break for a few weeks and see how you feel about it. At the very least, you could do some catching up and freeze some casseroles. And ask for some help and stop holding for yourself to such a high standard with housework. I absolutely adored my babysitter growing up.

I would focus on what is good for your sanity and your marriage. Tink is okay. My mom was a single mom and I still like cream of mushroom soup by itself because one Saturday morning that’s all that was in the house that I could fix for myself. No harm done. She’ll look back and respect her parents’ dedication.

I also think trying to find time a church service is a good idea. An hour of peace and ritual might just be the glue that holds you together.

I’ll pray for your strength and fortitude.

By: Meredith

Meredith — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 06:34:36 +0000

I feel for you, Tinksmom. You face hard choices at every turn. I, too, would hold Sundays sacred–for my own mental preservation, but also because your husband might benefit more from the restful home than restaurant help.

Right now I am praying the Memorare when things seem impossible:
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thine intercession was left unaided…